November 9, 2008
Dear President Ahmadinejad,
It was considerate of you to send a letter from your great state of Iran.
I've yet to assume office, but you -- always the sentimental statesman -- quickly take reins. You truly want to wipe disagreements between our nations off the map, I recall.
Let me return the gesture.
My trusted confidant Emanuel -- I'm sure you're familiar -- stepped right up to help. He suggests we unveil a new delicacy at my inaugural table; one that can stimulate our upcoming negotiations.
cc: Your ass