NORTHWEST FLY GUYS SAY THEY WERE MISUNDERSTOOD: MEANT TO SAY "LAPDANCE," NOT "LAPTOP." FEATHERED WITNESS CORROBORATES STORY

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Sub-Prime Pigeon Finds New San Francisco Victims

Photo by Creative Commons Attribution.


"There's no such thing as a bad neighborhood to Sub-Prime Pigeon. He can work anywhere, serve any community. We've got to keep working with him," said Pre-Approved Cat to Feckless Cat.

They were watching the criminal bird from a block off. What a fantastic, feathered friend to the poor!

Yes, as the sound of gunshots rang out, drug deals went on in plain sight, Sub-Prime Pigeon found the seed in need.

"Recession? What recession?" said Feckless. "Business is booming! They're just walking up to him with money! I love America!"


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PRE-APPROVED CAT TAKES LITTLE NAP AT SFO, GETS JOB OFFER FROM NORTHWEST AIRLINES

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Lie Lion Goes to Dinner in San Francisco

Lie Lion sat with his crowd of stunned admirers and fans at the Cat 'n Wealth Club on Market Street in San Francisco's Financial District.

"I love going to Masa's on Bush Street. Eating there is beyond good," said the lion.

"What could be worth those prices?" laughed Anvil the dog.

"Service, Anvil. Deer walked right up to my table after I ordered him. Mixed my Martini, too," said Lie Lion.

"Then you killed him and ate him, just like that? Right in front of everyone?" asked the incredulous Anvil.

"Sure. Chewed him up right there. Got a lot of job offers, too. Bunch of hedge fund guys there."

"Cool! Got any stock tips?" asked Anvil dog, panting big-time like the dummy dog he was and endeavored to be.

"Yes," said Lie Lion. "Open a Canadian bank account, like, yesterday," said the lion, licking his paw. "No, just kidding."

--30


Photos of cats available for adoption from SF SPCA site September 28, 2009.


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